Good Fear

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You’re totally tough and ridiculously kick-butt, right? I mean, that’s why you’re reading this blog. You’re awesome, mighty, and strong, while simultaneously delicate, feminine, and gentle. Bottom line, you’re practically indestructible.

Except when it comes to Facebook.

Do you ever read someone’s status or post and cringe? I know I do. There are certain things that the world just doesn’t need to know, no matter how indestructible you might be. This is one area in life where a little fear and caution go a long way.

The “Hey, Look At Me” Update

Yes, Facebook gives you an option to post where you are at. But, really? You want everyone to know where you are at at all times? It doesn’t matter if you have high privacy settings. Creepers are creepers and internet restrictions mean very little. Do you really want to post about where you are? Why not post after you’ve left?

The “I Want Everyone To Know How I Feel All The Time” Update

Great day. Horrible Day. Blah Day. Whatever happened, you put your emotions out there on display. That’s not being transparent. That’s perpetuating the stereotype that girls are emotional wrecks. Please, do us all a favor – keep the crazy under control.

The “I DNT HAV TME 2 TYP REEL WRDS” Update

Really? You don’t have five extra seconds to make full words so the rest of us don’t have to squint and scratch our heads, trying to decipher your secret code. Unless it really is a secret code. That’s actually kind of cool.

The “Come And Stalk Me” Update

Home alone and I’m bored. Home alone and I’m lonely. Home alone and I’m scared. Apparently, you’re home alone and have no common sense.

The “I Wouldn’t Say It In Real Life But I Will On Facebook” Update

We all know this person. Maybe you are this person. You aren’t brave and outspoken at school or to anyone’s face, but as soon as you sit down at your computer, the ugly truth – complaints about people, opinions, lectures – come out in full force. If you wouldn’t say it to someone’s face, don’t say it at all.

This isn’t meant to hinder you, tough girl. It’s meant to encourage you to use your kick-butt-ness in as wise, cautious, not scary way as possible.

What’s the worst status update you’ve ever seen?

PS – Don’t forget, you have the chance to win a free copy of my book! Just subscribe if you haven’t already. And, every time you comment, you will be entered into the drawing.

Related articles

• 5 ways Facebook could help you avoid embarrassing situations (thenextweb.com)
• How to: Manage Social Media and Online Distractions (oneforty.com)

How To Force Yourself To Have A Quiet Time

Image by Leo Reynolds via Flickr

What would you say is the number one excuse for not having a quiet time? Is it feeling like the Bible is boring? Or maybe believing that prayer doesn’t really work? Nope.

 

I don’t have enough time.

 

What’s amazing about this excuse is that 1) Everybody everywhere has the same amount of time. Super holy people aren’t given an extra three hours in their day. 2) That twenty four hours we have every day is given to us by God Himself. I’m sure He knew what He was doing when He planned it like that.

 

The problem isn’t having enough time. The problem is time management. It’s what you do with your time.

 

The best way to have a quiet time is to get into a routine. Have a set time during the day where you sit down, read your Bible, and spend some time praying. There are several ways to do this.

 

The Crack of Dawn Quiet Time

Wake up early. Set the alarm for fifteen or thirty minutes early. Take a shower first! That way, you are much more awake when you open your Bible. You can even do it while eating breakfast. It’s a great way to start your day.

 

The Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Quiet Time

The day is over. Homework is done. Teeth are brushed and the house is quiet. You round out your day by thinking about all the Lord has done and go to sleep with His Word dancing around your head. Though I would recommend not doing this one in bed. Sleepy time Bible reading and prayer usually just turns into sleep.

 

The Anti Social Lunch Quiet Time

Instead of eating in the cafeteria with your friends, you hide in the library or a classroom and read your Bible in the middle of the day. It’s kind of like hitting pause in the midst of chaos, getting realigned with the Truth, and getting energized for the rest of the day.

 

There are many enemies when it comes to quiet times. These are quiet time suckers. Little things that you do that take away time in which you could be hanging out with Jesus. If you have time to do these things, you certainly have time to read your Bible.

 

Watching TV

Facebook

Texting

Facebook

Snacking

Facebook

Facebook

Facebook

Let’s face it. If you have time to check your Facebook, text a friend, and watch an episode of Psych, you have time to read your Bible. Make a conscious choice to not do those things until you’ve spent time with Him.

 

Have you read your Bible today? If you read this, you certainly have time to read that.

 

Single For A Season (part 2)

Image by ElenahNeshcuet via Flickr

So, you’re single for a reason and you’re single for a season. But what should that season look like? How do you know if you’re doing it right?

 

WARNING: One or more of these will probably offend you. If it does, then I know I’m doing my job

 

Time wasted vs. Time well spent – The first part of Single For A Season kind of covered this, but I can’t emphasize it enough. What are you spending your time doing? Are you investing in other tough girls? Are you being a good friend? Or are you so focused on guys that it’s all that you talk about and think about?

 

Texting fiend vs. Texting queen – Grab your phone and check your text history. Who are you spending your time texting? Is every other text one to a guy? Are your texts to your friends about guys? Are you that girl who texts a guy and, when they don’t respond right away, you text him again? And again? Oh, tough girl, please don’t. You’re wasting time (and minutes!) Here’s a couple of tough girl texting etiquette tips:

 

- Text with a purpose. Don’t just text a guy to say hi or ask how he’s doing. And don’t just make up a reason, either.

- Don’t be pushy. If he doesn’t text you back, let it be. Remember, guys pursue you, not the other way around.

- Don’t text it if you wouldn’t say it in real life. Texting has this nasty habit of making you seem like you’re something you’re not. You can seem flirty, mean, desperate, or annoying. All because of a few texts.

- Don’t text guys more than your girl friends. It’s a really good indicator of if you are wasting this single season in life.

 

Facebook foe vs. Facebook friend – This is pretty similar to the texting stuff except for one thing: EVERYONE can see it! If you comment several times on a guy’s status update, ‘like’ everything he posts, and say ‘hi’ every time he pops up on chat, you’re not exactly being subtle. So curb it. Calm down. Remember that whole, “It’s not my job to pursue him,” thing.

When you find yourself cyber stalking a guy (Yes, I’m talking to you. You know, that whole check his profile several times every day to see if other girls are talking to him thing? Yeah, that’s creepy), focus your attention on your friends. Send them a message as opposed to that guy. Comment on their status updates instead. Show the world that you are using this single season for awesome, godly purposes. Do you find that whole chat thing too juicy to resist? Make a “friend” list that is only your girl friends. Then make yourself available to chat only to them.

 

Selfish vs. Selfless – So you’re being a good friend. You aren’t a texting fiend or a Facebook foe. But how are you spending your time at home? If you are so excited to date and get married some day, are you preparing yourself now? When’s the last time you cleaned something in your house without being asked? Or did your own laundry? How about cooked a meal?

I hate to break it to you, tough girl, but you aren’t going to get married and suddenly want to do those home chores. You won’t wake up one morning and know how to cook fantastic meals. That stuff takes practice and discipline. So, why not start now? Don’t be a slob. Don’t expect other people to do everything for you. Take initiative. Take care of yourself, your home, and your family.

 

Spiritual moocher vs. Spiritual teacher – Where are you at in your walk with Christ? I’m sure you dream of someday being with an amazing godly guy who knows his Bible, can speak all those big theology words, and is a great leader. But are you a girl worthy of a guy like that?

Jesus needs to be the center of your life right now. If you think you need a guy to make you happy, then your heart isn’t where it needs to be for that relationship you so desperately want. Because Jesus is your everything. And when you get married some day, He will still be your everything. So are you growing in your relationship with Him? Are you reading your Bible, devoting yourself to church and godly teaching? Are you taking the time to invest in other girls, teaching them and helping them in their Christian walks?

You will be with an amazing man someday who will encourage you in your relationship with Jesus. But you should be mature enough that you encourage him as well.

 

You’re single for a season, tough girl. Don’t waste it. Do it right.

And rejoice! This season isn’t forever. But it certainly is amazing. So live it up!

 

Read the previous posts in this series:

Single For A Reason (part 1)

Single For A Reason (part 2)

Video Viernes #26

Single For A Season (part 1)

 

Testing Toughness

Have you had your toughness put to the test?

I love being sassy. I love cracking jokes. I like getting the upper hand over ninjas and kicking some serious zombie butt.

But I am the least confrontational person in the world. So, of course, this is what gets put to the test.

The other day I hopped on Facebook, doing the whole Facebook creeper thing, when I spotted a young man who shall remain nameless having a conversation with someone else. (Why do people do that, anyway? Have these status update conversations for the world to see?) In this conversation, this young man who shall remain nameless used and incredibly inappropriate word that made my jaw drop.

What does a tough girl do in this situation?

My first instinct, I’m embarrassed to say, was to just log off, close my eyes, and chant worship music until the image of that nasty word faded from my mind.

But that’s hardly tough.

So I sent him a private message (because posting it on his wall would have been mean and not tough at all) and called him out. With hands shaking I told him in a kind and loving yet sassy and kick-butt way that he should know better.

Within two minutes, the whole conversation – horrible word and all – got erased. The young man who shall remain nameless later told my husband that it felt like I kicked him in, uh, a certain region of his body.

My toughness got tested. And I totally passed.

How has your toughness been tested lately?