Shakespeare Got It Wrong

Okay, don’t stone me for being sacrilegious. But let’s be honest – if we’re looking for totally tough girls to look up to, Shakespeare isn’t exactly producing cream of the crop type stuff. If he did, things might look more like this:

Ophelia: Forget going crazy and killing yourself after your boyfriend – also a few eggs short of a dozen – kills your conspiring father. No. Kick butt Ophelia would have stepped in when her friend Hamlet (because tough girls know better than to date those moody bad boys) started heading to the funny farm, hooked him up with an awesome mentoring older dude, showed her daddy a little forgiveness for being a putz, then gotten herself out of that miserable Denmark and headed somewhere tropical.

Katherine: Okay, first off, no girl should be referred to as a shrew in need of taming. That being said, kick butt Katherine would keep her independent spirit while getting rid of that man hating spirit. She’d be just as smart and sassy with a little more gentleness and a lot more kindness.

Portia: There isn’t much to fault Portia with. She’s obviously very pretty, smart, crafty, and resourceful. She’s submissive to her father even when he has a rather unorthodox way of finding her a husband (Step right up, gentlemen! You’ve a one in three shot here!). She’s thoughtful and kind, saving that merchant of Venice, yet also administers judgment and justice. Sounds like a stand out tough girl, right? Ladies, do me a favor – don’t dress like a man. No mission, friendship, or relationship is worth it! Don’t dress like a man.

Juliet: But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? Not Juliet! Kick butt Juliet wouldn’t be up late thinking about how she wants to throw away her life in order to run off with some guy she just met. No, tough girl Juliet would go on a couple of group dates with Romeo, let him woo her parents before he tried to woo her, and there would be no poisons, swords, or suicide whatsoever.

All that being said, there’s one Shakespeare girl that seems to rise above the rest:

Beatrice: Who doesn’t want to be known as strong, fiery, fiercely loyal in the friend department, a loving daughter, and totally content with being single? Top it all off with ending up with that guy she always pretended to hate but secretly loved, just biding her time till he came to his senses. She wasn’t much ado about nothing. She just knew what to be ado about.

Spew

Okay, I don’t care how tough you are, the idea of vomit is disgusting. I’m a contagious throw-upper, to the point that someone even faking the noises makes my stomach churn.

This last week I went on a mission trip to San Francisco with forty two high schoolers and seven other adults. And while I witnessed God doing amazing things, I also came across some disgusting spew.

Complaining.

Nothing can drain the energy of a group, bring people down, and dampen spirits more than someone whose negative attitude, pessimistic outlook, and whininess can’t be contained. It doesn’t matter how small or how big the thing is they complain about. It’s all annoying, frustrating, and downright nauseating.

Now don’t get me wrong. Girls should always be aware of our propensity toward gossip. And while complaining may not be as damaging as gossip, it both brings other people down and lowers their view of us. I mean, who in the world actually looks up to and wants to emulate a whiner?

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” – Ephesians 4:29

So, tough girl, watch your mouth. Let every word you say be a chance to build others and Jesus up. Memorize that verse up there. Tattoo it on your head. Sink it in your heart. Above all, live it.

And if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

Devour

What do you devour, tough girl?

Me? Well, I devour books. I’m always reading at least three at a time. Some I skim. Some take me longer than others. But, for the most part, I devour them. I’ll stay up all night just to get to a stopping point – which, typically, is the end of the book. Or I’ll hole myself up in the bathroom just to capture a few minutes and consume a chapter or two. I’m notorious for spending seventeen dollars on a new release only to finish it two days later.

I also devour candy. Make it fruit and you’ve peaked my interest. Add in gummy and I’m hooked. And if it’s sour? I devour. I’ve made myself sick inhaling sour gummy candy driven by something inside that never seems to be satisfied, even as my tongue suffers nasty side effects.

All tough girls are marked by a passion that seems extreme at times. Maybe you don’t devour books or sour gummy candy, but I am sure there are a few things in your life that you take to an extreme, making people scratch their heads and wonder just how in the world you do that.

I long to devour the Bible. To not be able to get enough of it, anxious to read it every day. I want to devour what it says, erring on believing it too much as opposed to not enough. I want to devour what God says to me through it, allowing it to convict me, cut me, refine me, change me, transform me.

When’s the last time I just sat with God’s Word, prepared to have my world rocked by what it says? When’s the last time I said to God, “You’re right and I’m wrong?” Whenever I read books, I never say, “I don’t really like that, so I’m just going to pretend it’s not there.” When I eat candy, I don’t say, “Have less sugar and don’t make my butt big and then I’ll eat you.” I devour them wholly and completely, just the way they are.

So I’ll ask again – what do you devour, tough girl? And, more importantly, how?

It Takes Two

Today my son wore his favorite shirt. Blue with Batman and Robin AKA The Dynamic Duo.

Batman and Robin

Milk and Cookies

PB & J

All great things come in pairs.

If tough girls have a kryptonite, it’s independence. The feeling of “I can do this life thing all by myself.” Or the opposite, “No one wants to do this life thing with me so I guess I’ll do it by myself.”

Girls gossip. Girls back bite. We’re smiling one minute and talking smack the next. We exclude one person on Monday and are their best friend on Friday.

The most kick-butt girls are the ones who team up, sticking together through thick and thin, quick to forgive and even quicker to encourage. They lift each other up, rejoice instead of harboring jealousy, and know that toughness shared is toughness intensified.

My kick-butt partners in crime are my friends Julie and Jennifer, two awesome gals who I know have my back no matter what and who I would go to the ends of the earth for.

Are you part of a dynamic duo? Or a terrific trio? Want to be?

Testing Toughness

Have you had your toughness put to the test?

I love being sassy. I love cracking jokes. I like getting the upper hand over ninjas and kicking some serious zombie butt.

But I am the least confrontational person in the world. So, of course, this is what gets put to the test.

The other day I hopped on Facebook, doing the whole Facebook creeper thing, when I spotted a young man who shall remain nameless having a conversation with someone else. (Why do people do that, anyway? Have these status update conversations for the world to see?) In this conversation, this young man who shall remain nameless used and incredibly inappropriate word that made my jaw drop.

What does a tough girl do in this situation?

My first instinct, I’m embarrassed to say, was to just log off, close my eyes, and chant worship music until the image of that nasty word faded from my mind.

But that’s hardly tough.

So I sent him a private message (because posting it on his wall would have been mean and not tough at all) and called him out. With hands shaking I told him in a kind and loving yet sassy and kick-butt way that he should know better.

Within two minutes, the whole conversation – horrible word and all – got erased. The young man who shall remain nameless later told my husband that it felt like I kicked him in, uh, a certain region of his body.

My toughness got tested. And I totally passed.

How has your toughness been tested lately?

Rock Solid

Nothing is more disappointing than seeing a tough girl trade her kick-buttness in for something significantly less honorable. Here’s a few examples:

• A girl who totally changes who she is and what she does for a guy
• A girl who totally changes who she is and what she does for a group of girls
• A girl who changes how she dresses or what she thinks about herself for either of the above reasons
• A girl who changes what she believes based on popular opinion (i.e. stuff on TV, the internet, People magazine, Oprah, etc.)

You can’t be a tough girl without a solid foundation. And just saying, “Jesus is my foundation,” isn’t good enough.

Ask yourself: Where did I come from? Who am I? Why am I here? What do I believe about right and wrong? What will happen to me after I die?

The biggest thing is WHY? Why do you believe what you believe? Where did those ideas come from?

Everybody has answers to those questions and, whether or not they know it, their answers shape who they are. It’s called your worldview. Those answers are your foundation.

So, tough girl, what does your foundation look like?

PS – My foundation is Ephesians 2:1-10 if you want to check it out

Tough Girl Rules To Live By

I woke up with one thought on my mind: today I am one day closer to dying than yesterday.  Seriously, I’m not trying to be morbid or anything.  But it’s true!  That’s why I came up with these two tough girl rules to live by.

Rule #1 – Live each day like you’re dying.  If none of us knows what tomorrow will bring, why put things off?  Kick-butt girls live every day with enthusiasm, gusto, joy, excitement and an adventurous spirit. We speak our minds, defend others, make a difference, do our homework, eat what we want, clean our rooms, and laugh at everything.  We don’t waste it in front of the TV or computer, we don’t mope around complaining about friends, strangers or worst of all boys, and we don’t live waiting for what’s next but love what we have right now.

Rule #2 – Live like you know where you’re going.  Heaven is going to be stinkin’ awesome!  And when we get there, we want to look Jesus in the face knowing we’ve done everything possible for Him while we were alive.  That means the things I do, the words I speak, and the thoughts I think should all be in relation to heaven.  They should be heaven worthy.

All right, I’m done ranting.  Hopefully I’ll blog for you again.  If not, no big deal.  Because I’m off to do some no holds, no regrets, kick-butt living.

Not Feeling So Tough

I’m not gonna lie, readers.  I’m not feeling so tough today.

It all starts with five minutes.  Maybe they get lost when you wake up a little late.  Maybe they get lost when you go for that second lather in the shower.  Whatever it is, those lost five minutes ruin EVERYTHING.  Suddenly, you’re five minutes late.  Your insides tense as you will the clock to move slower, but the clock refuses to listen.  Every light turns red.  Every slow driver in the world just happens to be right in front of you.  Those guys in orange jump suits stick those “slow” sign right in your face, laughing like they know what torture they’re causing (since you know you won’t speed because kick-butt girls obey the law unless lives or national security are at stake.)

Add to that toes in desperate need of some pedicure love and you get how I’m feeling.

Here’s the thing: we tough girls are allowed our not-so-tough moments.  Whatever the reason – be it our own fault, someone else’s fault, or plain old PMS – we’re allowed to be sad or mad or moody or totally annoyed at all those red lights!

But just for a moment.

Because kick-butt girls know we have way too much butt-kicking to do to let a bad day keep us down.  So we run to the bathroom, let a tear or two fall (we all wear waterproof mascara, right?) look ourselves in the mirror and remind ourselves to get back in the game.

“Therefore, my beloved brothers (and kick-butt sisters), be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord…” – 1 Corinthians 15:58